Neglected Outsiders Anti-Defamation Society

So now that we've tackled the fact that a distressingly large number of people in this fandom masquerade their gay porn as fanfiction in a pathetic attempt to garner more reviews, we will -- with much disgust -- address Curtiscest.

Yes, people are writing fanfic depicting two or more of the Curtis brothers getting it on with each other. 

Now, pretties, incest does bother us, but we think a good story could be constructed using it as a plot point. However, it would require research and skilled writing -- two things 99.9 percent of the writers in this fandom lack. 

A story involving incest -- like one involving rape -- would have to be researched enough to accurately portray the feelings of both abuser and the abused. Yes, that's right, pretties -- we used the words "abuser" and "abused." Why? Because incest is abuse. The abuser uses his/her position of power and trust to violate the abused.

It's not a romantic relationship -- in a healthy romantic relationship, both partners are on a level playing field. There's no romance in fucking your brother, someone with whom you are supposed to have built a sibling relationship and who looks up to you and trusts you. Especially not in the case of Darry/Soda or Darry/Ponyboy, where, if they lose Darry, they will go to a boys' home. That's a powerful motivator to please and puts Darry squarely in the driver's seat.

People are built not to be attracted to their siblings, because when you have incest, you get deformed and mentally retarded children at a much higher rate than in the general population. Genetically, we are built not to get it on with our siblings.

Fine, but there's no Curtis sister to pregnate, you might be saying, if you are one of those sick fuckers who like Curtiscest. No, there isn't, but you know what? Just leave the nice gay people alone, okay? 

Is it not bad enough that most places in America, they can't marry or adopt? That the Boy Scouts won't let a gay man be a pack leader because of the unspoken fear he might molest a cute little Cub Scout? Gay people are fighting enough stereotypes about deviancy. Gays are no more likely to be pervs than straight people, but you wouldn't know it from the huge amounts of brother-on-brother fucking in Curtiscest fics. 

The thing that really pisses us off is that incest is portrayed in a postive light by these authors, as if, because two people are physically attractive, they should be able to have sex with one another with no emotional or legal ramifications despite the fact they are related. Would you fuck your brother or sister? What? Aren't they attractive enough for you?

Incest is not okay. It's just not, no matter what way you slice it or how you try to pretty it up. It's abuse, it's illegal and it's morally wrong. Ponyboy is not going to fall in love with Darry because Darry boned him up the ass. He's far more likely to feel anger, self-hate and shame. He certainly isn't going to cuddle against his chest and call him his Boo-Boo Bear. 

But NOADS (or creeps -- whatever works for you), you might be saying, these are only fictional characters. Why do you care? Well, pretties, there are many reason that we care, and we will numerate them for you. 

Firstly, it's bad characterization -- we've never seen a Curtiscest fic where the characters were in character, and we've never seen a fic where the remainder of the gang -- including whichever brother isn't violating natural law -- wasn't more or less okay with it. This is unrealistic. Would you really applaud one of your friends if they were having an incestious relationship with a sibling? 

We thought so. 

Secondly, it is bad plotting. There is no development and it's usually a case of Darry and Soda catching each other's eye over the chicken and biscuits one night and deciding that they have an incestious passion for each other on the spot. 

There may or may not be angst, but there will be much boysex and fighting between the two. Not fighting as teenage boys would fight, but fighting like girls would fight, because, frankly most guys are not writing incestious gay porn. We wish they would, because they'd probably do a better job at conveying boys' attitudes toward sex and having their bungholes violated by their older brothers. 

Thirdly, this shit is so predictable that if we weren't grinding our teeth in frustration at the stupid bitches who go, "oh my god! C. Thomas Howell and Rob Lowe are soooooo hot! You know you like it and want to see them make sexxors!" we would be yawning. 

Also, we're fairly certain that S.E. Hinton, Francis Ford Coppola and Messers. Howell and Lowe would be squicked out of their minds.

Fourthly, this is a young adult novel. Yeah, there are a lot of serious topics addressed in it, but remember that this is, for a lot of kids, the first schoolbook they pick up that they really like. We mock the shit out of Mary Sues, but we'd far rather have the kiddos come across a millon Sues than an incest fic. 

Seriously, there's enough bad shit in the world without romantizing something this fucking disgusting. Go write your gay porn and give them names like "Dirk Steel" and "Dan Danger," not "Ponyboy" and "Soda." Take your incest and get the fuck out of the fandom, freak.

In more amusing news, teh fanbrats have found us!

In the last installment of "Why NOADS wishes the great majority of the fandom would develop an ugly skin rash and be unable to sit at the computer anymore," we mocked ivy and her Curtiscest fic. We also mocked her fellow fetish writers, pmcurtis and rivergirl. Well, pmcurtis must have googled herself or something, because we got another PM -- as in private message, not Ponyboy Michael.

We'll be in bold, as usual.

FGW Case File No. 2.a: Ivy & the Curtiscest AKA "Call a Waahmbulance."

Just a quick note I hope you'll take the time to read.

What is it with these fanbrats and their mock politeness anymore? Admit it -- you're upset. You wouldn't be writing this otherwise. Wouldn't it be more emotionally honest to start out with "Fuck you"?

I have a grade 4 glioblastoma, 

And that excuses your poor writing and interest in unnatural sexual practices how?

which at times (unfortunately, more often than not) makes me forget certain things...spelling included.  

Spellcheck. Use it. 

Oh, and by the way, you misspelled a great deal of words in your little review that we didn't mock. With "mutiny," it was the combination of misspelling and misuse that made it stand out. You might want to try and stick with words you understand the meanings of. It does you no good to use big words in an effort to make yourself seem smarter if you misuse them. That, ironically enough, just makes you look dumb.

Go ahead.   Laugh at that.

We're far more likely to make fun of your poor writing skills, but thanks for the permission to mock you. Not that we needed it, but we appreciate it anyway.

 For your "group" 

We're a society. That's why it's called the Neglected Outsiders Anti-Defamation Society. See? It says it at the top of the page. Just an FYI. 

to criticize my spelling without fully knowing my situation was inconsiderate, childish, and wrong. 

Well, since you didn't attach a handy biography to your review, we sort of had to work in the dark. In addition to this, we really didn't give a shit.  Why should we be considerate to you? We left a review, and you decided to address us. Why in the name of God should we temper ourselves and make an attempt not to hurt your tender feelings?

Ah, righoutness. Your 'group' is so proud of rightousness. 

What?! Right whatisous? Right-out-ness? SPELL CHECK FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, OKAY?

I joined this site because I like to read 

You joined this site because you like to read, huh? Well, you sure got fucked, didn't you? They don't call it the Pit of Voles for nothing.

and at time to try my hand at writing.

Anything but more poorly written slash, incest or Mary Sues, please. Or else we may be forced to review whatever vomitous mess you spew across the screen. 

My doctors informed me that it might also be a good form of therapy for me - to help me with my memory. 

And again, we really don't give a flying fuck at a donut about your personal life. Really, we don't. This just comes off as a sad and pathetic attempt to make us feel guilty for mocking you. Obviously, if it were working, we wouldn't be here.

When will you fanbrats learn? There are four things you pull out in the case of an emergency like this: "Don't like, don't read," your Internet suicide, your Internet lawyer and your Internet disease. "Don't like, don't read" hasn't worked, so you're on option No. 2. 

I didn't join to have a group, like the one you are so proud of, tear apart reviews I leave.  

So what? Like we care what your reasons for joining were? What we care about is the fact that you decided you would defend poor writing, poor characterization and incest in general. You were terribly quick on the offense, but your defense leaves much to be desired. 

In addition, don't think we haven't noticed that you've failed to mention a single word about the incest you were so hot to defend in the beginning. Too bad; that would have been much funnier than you crying over some medical condition we don't give a shit about.

How sad it is when one feels more compassion for a fictional character than for a fellow human being.  

Anyone who thinks that promoting incest in a postive light is okay is not someone we want to consider a fellow human being.

My friends, the people who write these stories are 'PEOPLE - plain ordinary peolple'.  

People who like to read about incest. What is so plain and ordinary about that?

The same as you and me. 

Um, no. We don't enjoy incest and spanking, thanks. You all stay on your side of the line, okay?

Go ahead.  Tear my message apart.  

How can we resist, when you make it so easy?

Repost it in any manner you wish.  

We will.

And laugh until your sides ache.  

That, too.

But, please, stop hurting people without fulling knowing their stories.   

You know, there is something very interesting about the Internet -- a good deal of what you throw up can be seen by anyone, and those people, in many situations, can respond to you. Now, a sensible person, knowing this, would only put out those things that they were comfortable with other people viewing and commenting on. If they didn't feel they could handle that, they wouldn't put it out for public consumption.

We aren't members of the Rainbow Wagon. We aren't here to kiss your boo-boos and make it all better. If you want to get into a pissing match with us, you had better be damn sure to bring it, and something a lot more convincing than this weak attempt at shaming us. Badfic has stolen our souls, and we have no shame or joy. 

When we review, we don't give a shit about your personal life or how it affects what you produce. We care about good writing. We don't confuse the author with the piece, but too many authors confuse critique with personal attacks, and want to bring their personal lives into it to excuse why they don't have proper grammar or why their plot blows. 

We couldn't give the piss of a diseased shithouse rat. We care about the writing and your friend ivy's sucked. Get over it. Not everyone in the world is going to like you, your friends or your digusting little stroke fics. 

Feel free to reply.

Just did, thanks.