Neglected Outsiders Anti-Defamation Society

*Sigh* You know, back some people up in a corner, and they simply refuse to admit they are wrong. We really must be getting under Two-Bitty's skin, because s/he has posted another reference to us in hir author profile page.

And, still, s/he refuses to link to us. How inconsiderate.

Apparently, NOADS wants to learn my whole life story. 

Actually, we don't give a shit. We merely questioned how the character -- admittedly based on you, but that isn't our fault, now is it? -- could be both Norwegian and British. We're sure your life story will be full of woe and angst, though.

Well... I was born in Oslo, Norway to James(British) and Sarah(Norwegian) Grau. 

So, you're Nowegian of British ancestry. Too bad you don't understand that you can't hold citizenship in three countries at the same time.

At the age of four, my parents were killed in a car accident and I was sent to an orphanage(I know that cause I got the guys down at the orphange to tell me). 

If true, how tragic. Of course, this happens to many people, and they don't demand the world embrace their shitty fanfic because of it. 

At ten, I was moved to America, in Virginia. 

Great, now you've posted all the information anyone would ever need to track you down. Idiot. Good thing this isn't your real life.

Um... what else? 

We don't care. Really. This is as unconvincing as anything else you've written. 

I was adopted by the Gray's, who have two daughters, at the time were six and three(now 17 and 14). 

Dull. Where's our woe cake topped with an angst cherry?

At fifteen, I pushed a bastard out a window and he died, poor soul. 

Too bad violent crimes show up in the many background searches that are done on teachers and anyone else who has shit to do with a school. Those people aren't hired by school boards, by the way.

Um, I was sent to Juvie at fifteen through seventeen, but was given permission to stay through school.

Bullshit. If you are 21 now, you would have been in juvenile detention around 2001-2003. Juvenile detention centers have their own internal schools. The children incarcerated are not allowed to attend school outside of detention because of the escape risk. A child in for a violent crime -- manslaughter -- certainly would not be allowed out to attend school. You obviously don't know jack shit about the criminal detention centers in this country. Or did you committ this crime in Norway?

I was pulled up a couple of grades.

With that grammar? We scoff. 

I got out of Juvie and finished highschool. I went to college and got my degree and now here I am, my first year as a eigth grade English/History teacher. 

Oh, thank God. We were afraid you were an eighth grade English teacher. 

What sort of school doubles up English and history anyway, especially in the days of No Child Left Behind and highly qualified teachers, which are especially stressed in grades six and up? 

With a working knowledge of about 15 different districts in three states, we haven't seen those two subjects doubled up anywhere. English and literature, yes, but not English and history.

I teach my little sister, Fai, who is now 14. 

Poor child. Does she have awful grammar as well?

My brother(15) lives in Kuwait(not real brother, but I think of him just as close or closer). 

Boring. This does not move the story along.

Met my best friend Damon(21 since Aug. 1) while I was an assistant teacher for the seventh grade hallway.

Do you release that sentance reads like you were teaching the hallway? And you expect us to believe that you actually have submitted a resume to a school administrator and were interviewed and hired? Seriously, are you kidding us?

I think that's it.

Thank God. We almost fell asleep.

Happy now?

Not really.

YAY!

BOO!

We also received a private message from Two-Bitty, because s/he seems convinced that if s/he argues hir case well enough, we will be swayed. T-B, we are still convinced that you are a 14-year-old girl, sorry.

Anyway, onto the LOLZ ... 

I tried to set the story in the year the movie was made, 1983.

Yet nowhere is that noted. Also, you might remember that "The Outsiders" is listed in the book category, so most people are working on the assumption that the settings used reflect the book. 

Aaaaaand, the movie is set in 1966. Why on earth would you set it in 1983 and expect anyone to be able to tell unless you firmly set it there. You're saying this because we called you on the anachronisms, aren't you?

My mother was Norwegian and my father was British. Introduced through friends.

Yawn. Don't care. Your wording was clunky and implied your character was a native of two different countries at the same time.

I accidentally pushed a guy out a window and sadly he didn't make it. I don't know how exactly they recorded it. I call it murder, you call is manslaughter, so I may call it manslaughter.

Weren't you there when you were tried, convicted and sentenced to juvenile detention? We are fairly sure they would have told you what you were found guilty of or plead to. Your understanding of that is a fairly important part of the proceedings. That's why the judge asks, "Do you understand the charges against you?"

Soda decided to be annoying to call Two-Bit 'Keith'

Plausible, but not shown in your writing.

I admit I went a little far sayin' "He also had a way of making sure his voice matched the original singers voice and empo exactly" so you got me there.

We respect that; we will respect it even more if a change makes its way into the fic. 

Yes, I am stubborn, gotta prob with it?

What on earth would you do about it if we did?

Sorry for adding an 'e' on 'blond'

Another glimmer of hope.

The Emilio thing? Once again, I tried with the 1983 timing in which he was 25.

No, he wasn't. Emilio Estevez was 20/21 in 1983. He would have been 25/26 in 1988. 

He was born May 12, 1962, and he was 19 years old at the time "The Outsiders" was filmed in the spring of 1982. 

Besides that, he was a virtual unknown in 1983 -- he'd appeared in three television movies and "Tex." He wasn't a cultural reference yet, and would not become one until 1985, the year "St. Elmo's Fire" and "The Breakfast Club" was released -- two years after you claim your fic is set.

You don't know shit about 1966, and you don't know shit about 1983. You are a history teacher?

John Travolta thing? Again, 1983. 

Again, you ret-conned to excuse the anachronisms.

Rocky Horror? Need I say it again?

That you fucked up? You haven't admitted it yet. However, you do think rather fast on your feet. We give you that.
 
Silver mustang? Boredom, don't bug me. I admit I'm not always correct in the history portion of the stories I write. You got me there.

Again, you're a history teacher, yet you are "not always correct in the history portion"? Is it okay for your students to fudge as well? Doesn't matter, really, because if they did, you probably wouldn't pick up on it.

I have slang, and at home it get's the best of me so there goes good grammer.

Do you expect us to take you seriously when you say you are a teacher, when you can't spell the subject you claim to teach correctly? It's grammar -- with an "a." What school do you work for again?

Don't bug me about the way I make Darrel and Steve a little OCC.

A little? They are unrecognizeable as the canon characters. And why shouldn't we bug you? We're here to read fanfiction about Susie's book, not about how awesome you think you are. You're not exactly sly about how you have all the canon characters expressing admiration for your self-insert.

Go ahead and down on all my stories, I'm not gettin' mad anymore.

Another beatiful relationship down the tubes.