Neglected Outsiders Anti-Defamation Society

For your convenience, dear badfic warriors, we present you with the following review, which can be adjusted to suit your badfic needs.

Dear Suethor,

You have created a badfic. 

(Dallas/Darry/Johnny/Ponyboy/Sodapop/Steve/Two-Bit) is horribly out of character. 

He would not (fall inexplicably into puppy love/abuse Ponyboy from "his" armchair while reading the paper/inexplicably forget about his shyness and distrust of strangers/become emo and start cutting/forget his girlfriend and/or heartbreak over said girlfriend and fall for a Mary Sue/become a sad little abused woobie/act like a stupid, drunken clown). Go back to the source material and re-read. Take notes on said greaser's characterization.

In addition to failing at the characterization of the aforementioned greaser, your character is a (Rebel!/Emo!/Mother!/Helpless!/Goth!/Asskicking!Action!/Soc!/Bleeding!Heart!)Mary Sue. 

A Mary Sue is an idealized character. She is the author's attempt to insert herself into the story. Mary Sues are blatantly obvious and annoying to the reader because their characterization is flat, they are the focus of the story instead of the characters which fans want to read about and the author refuses to give them flaws or make them fallible in any way. 

She is perfect, and everyone loves her. A character like this is extremely hard for a skilled writer to make likable and impossible for an unskilled writer. You fall in the later category. 

Also, your plotting abilities are weak. Your plot (drags/skips from scene to scene without explanation/introduces elements without explanation and/or follow up/doesn't have a direction). An outline, instead of "pulling it from your @ss," so to speak, would help immeasurably. You are failing around, and it shows.

You also have atrocious grammar. Grammar is important, because if you have bad grammar, it makes readers doubt your writing abilities, and rightfully so. If you don't practice care in this most basic part of the writing craft, what is to make us believe you would practice it anywhere else?

It doesn't matter that you've said (this fic is AU/no flames/don't like, don't read/my story, I'll do what I want/shut up you stupid hater meanies), this fic doesn't deliver for the reader, despite the three repeat reviewers who write grammatically incorrect sentence fragments telling you to update soon, plz.

Either improve this or chop this. Do it because you want to honor what Susie did, not because you want to share your fantasies of sexing up Matt Dillon, who would likely be uninterested in your jailbait @ss anyway. He has a Cameron Diaz-level of standards.

Love,

A badfic warrior